Dear Non-Educator Parents,
After my child’s recent issues in school (explained in the previous post
) I joined a support group for parents of dyslexic children on Facebook to ask questions and see what other parents had experienced. MAN, was that a shock. It opened a completely different can of worms.
Parents and teachers need much better lines of communication. Many parents in the group are frustrated because they have been through the “system” so many times and there is so much red tape. By the time they get to dealing with the teacher, they are already angry and have pre-
In this Facebook group, there are some very great things posted. Pictures of severely dyslexic kids receiving their diploma, student work, motivational stories and lots of resources and knowledge from these parents who have spent hours studying the issue and finding tools to help their children.
However, many of the posts are directly related to something a teacher or school did that the parent disagrees with. These posts have been very difficult for me to read. I do realize that not all teachers are good teachers with effective teaching practices. However, I would venture to say 90% of educators are teachers who try their best and work very hard to do their job. Most teachers got into teaching because they love kids and want to help shape them. Yes, there are a few who are in it for the vacations (and they should find another job), but most teachers are here because they are passionate about helping children learn and become better.
Things all non-educator parents need to know:
1. Positive and personal contact is needed with the classroom teacher on a consistent basis to get the best results for your child. Teachers do not know your child as well as you do and the Special Education training most of them have received is very minimal. Don’t wait for the teacher to call you, particularly if you have a child with special circumstances. They have the best intention of making parent contact, but it is okay for you to call first. Help them; offer solutions and strategies that you have found to be successful at home.
2. Follow the chain of command. First, speak with your child. If it is about grades on the parent portal or something they sent you a text about from school, wait to get more information before you make contact. While you should take your child’s explanation into account, just know that sometimes children only tell their personal view of things which may not be completely accurate. Then, if there is a problem that needs addressing, speak with the teacher first. Only as a last resort should you involve the principals or other administration. Most teachers want things to be as positive, efficient and successful as possible. Involving administration before the teacher has even been made aware of the issue isn’t fair.
3. Be supportive of your child’s teachers. The person you are dealing with is where they are right now because they are passionate about helping children learn. They are doing the best they can, and most want all children to thrive. In primary school, teachers teach multiple subjects with around 25 students per class. On the secondary level they are working with up to 200 students. In a class of 25 students it is not unusual for a teacher to have multiple Limited English Proficient students, Behavior Intervention Plans, students who require Response to Intervention documentation, 504 plans and Individual Education Plans. In addition to all of these individualized circumstances, they are having to maintain classroom order, prepare for lessons, grade, make parent contacts, attend meetings and…teach. As a parent, you have one child that you are totally focused on. You are making sure that everything possible is being done for that child. You are on top of your child’s grades, behavior, work, IEP, whatever it may be. You will spot any mistake easily, but the best thing to do is be understanding. Most importantly, never talk bad about your child’s teacher or their actions (even if they are out of line) in front of your child.
Be kind. Be patient. Communicate. Collaborate. Most teachers really do want the best for your child.
About the Author:
When Bethany Ivie
is not busy with her husband and three children, she is a hardworking educator and entrepreneur. With a passion for purpose, her blog, The Ivie League,
covers a variety topics providing readers with an uncensored view into her personal life.
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